TRANSFER POST – Health/Cancel

November 16, 2018

I had to cancel my trip out west to see him, all due to the ER visit a few weeks ago. I feel like crap still. I went back to the ER last Saturday due to a new symptom of extreme dizziness. Yet everything looked clean. I went to the surgeon. He scheduled an ultrasound, but it was only the transvaginal kind and did not really look at where the problem actually is. I am extremely frustrated. I am also not going to see my son for Thanksgiving. And I still have 3 weeks before I see my OBGYN. Oh, the surgeon wants me to get a colonoscopy too, fun! Still running low-grade fever, still light-headed, still feel there’s something in lower right pelvic region. Blah! Ex is starting to get upset that I am not doing as much as I used to – remember, he usually thinks I don’t do anything. So now that he is doing some (not all) of the running, he is upset. But it won’t make him appreciate me any more, i know. 

I figure by the time this all gets settled, I’ll end up having to cancel another meet up… 

TRANSFER POST – Down in the Dumps

Oct. 30, 2018

I’m still very down in the dumps. MM wife was in town all weekend so i haven’t talked to him since the 22nd. I dunno. I just have this “doom” sense going on. We won’t be meeting up like planned either – not til February (I hope). Holidays suck.

I was in the ER this weekend for ovarian pain (have a history of cysts and endometriosis) and I can’t get into see my OB-GYN til December! Yeesh! Plus still waiting for results from ex’s last scan over a week ago. And he’s been giving me a lot of hassle moreso than lately. Plus I’m supposed to go down to my son’s place for a week over Thanksgiving and have no idea what to do there for a week. I have no extra money to spend.

TRANSFER POST – Where Is His Head At?

September 23, 2018

Another marathon texting session with MM. I Didn’t talk to him all week because of his schedule. We talked 7 hours today. A few things came up that just made me wonder where his head is. One was a pregnancy (fetish) thing. We have both said in the past neither one of us wants kids. At my age it probably wouldn’t happen anyways, but I am still fertile according to my gyno. (I take the shot just to be sure). He made it into this big fantasy. It’s come up a few times before, but not like this. It has been building though. I guess my big thing is – is it just the sexualization of a fetish, or does he really want us together? He made it all like we would be together through the whole thing, what he would do to soothe my pains, have a home birth, etc. etc.  I think its mainly the sexualization, knowing him, but there has to be the desire to see me that way too, right? I told him, it made me almost wish I was fully fertile and don’t make me want it too much. 

This just popped into my mind right now –  Could he possibly be thinking of leaving his family and starting one with me? 

The other thing that got me was at the end. I told him thanks for a really great day and he said he “had to make up for being absent all week.” I told him he didn’t have to but that I loved that he did. He said he “wanted to.” And that it was “a great way to spend a day off”. That just got to me. That he WANTS to talk to me all day. Ugh. I still just can’t wrap my head around him wanting to be with me, even if it is just electronically.

Hellacious Week

October 12, 2019

I was able to get the car junked locally where it was sitting, after many hours of phone calls and internet searches. No one wanted to deal with it without someone to meet them. I finally found a place that would allow me to mail the title to them when I finally got home. So I want to give a HUGE shout out to R and R Junk Cars in Edinburgh, IN, for their help!

I was able to make a couple of sales which allowed me to buy a bus ticket. Of course, no bus comes directly to my little town, so I had to get to the nearest station, about 45 minutes away from my house.

I get to the bus okay. It was an older bus but I was able to have my own row. Part of the way through the trip, people start complaining about the heat. There was no A/C but it wasn’t horribly hot in there. It was stuffy, but I wasn’t sweating. The driver pulled over to open the hatches, but they were broken and unable to stay open. People started complaining that the “other driver” (previously) had just opened them and left the lid wide open and resting on the roof of the bus. Later there was a near riot over this, after being stuck in traffic. One passenger got up and opened the hatch, angering the driver. I just kept my head down and minded my own business.

The traffic, however, made me miss my connection to the next bus. Me and four others were stuck. Two were able to be re-routed easily, but the counter guy had to call a supervisor in Texas to add two stops on the next bus (6 hours later) to accommodate me and the other two left.

So, six hours in the station. We were given food vouchers at least. I had a few drinks with me and some cereal bars only, so the meal was appreciated. I met the other two ladies stranded and became rather close to one of them. It helped kill the time.

Originally, I had it set up that my brother would pick me up at the bus stop and take me home after he got off work. However, this delay caused a major change. His husband got really angry, and started yelling at me on the phone and basically teemed me a new asshole. I felt like shit enough over this whole situation. It was through no fault of my own that the bus got delayed. But he thinks my brother is too lenient and does too much for me. I have always paid back whatever I have borrowed from him. I didn’t ask him for bus fare – I got that in my own.

But my brother called to apologize – he didn’t need to, it wasn’t him that gave me the problems. He did pick me up without his husband and I did get home, feeling like absolute shit due to being yelled at (not only by my bro-in-law, but by someone else too.)

I do have another car lined up. But it will be a week before I can get it. Yesterday I walked up to the post office to mail the title out. Today I walked up to the small market in my neighborhood.

I still feel like crap, but a little better than I did.

And my MM was with family so I couldn’t really commiserate with him either.

Major Car Problems

October 8, 2019

I am down visiting my son. I was on my way home when my car died in the middle of nowhere. I don’t have AAA and I don’t have insurance that will cover towing. My son was able to get me a ride back to his place (he doesn’t drive), but I had to leave the car sit at a gas station. The car is 90 miles from my son’s place and 150 miles from home. My ex is at home. It’s the only car we have. We can’t afford to fix it or tow it. I guess the only other alternative is to junk it. But neither one of us can get to the car to sign papers or anything. It’s the transmission. I had a feeling it was going to die soon, but I was hoping to make it home.

I really don’t know what to do at this point.

I am stuck

gf.me/u/vv6a7w

Sigh

October 2, 2019

So I am down visiting my son while his roommate is on vacation. My MM is literally within 10 miles of me right now. ❤️ We were hoping to get together, just for a quickie. But his schedule is horrid. I have barely heard from him since we got together two weeks ago. And now it seems he has a cold. ugh. I know my sinuses have been playing havoc with me. So it’s looking doubtful we’ll get together. 💔 He’s probably overworked. I know I probably wore him out last time too. (sigh) So very, very close… I don’t want to push…

A Last Attempt by the Church

October 1, 2019

So, my Branch President stopped by my house last Sunday. I did not answer the door. This pi$$ed me off because I emailed him weeks ago and said not to visit. But he must have gotten the message. Today when I tried to log in to check my status on the LDS website, I could not get into the Branch directory. I logged in on my ex-husband’s account and was able to get in fine. Lo, and behold – my name is no longer in the directory! Finally! Success! It took them about 10 weeks from my first initial contact and 4 weeks from when I joined the lawyer’s site to be removed. Now I just wait for final confirmation!

REVIEW – Clitoral Sucking Vibe and Egg Bullet Vibe

September 25, 2019

This is a nice 2-piece set. I liked the color and it presents well. But I am somewhat disappointed in this product. With the amount of suction it produces, I expected better results. It might work better with someone else, but the clit sucker did not stimulate me at all. Perhaps I was over-stimulated from use of the bullet, which worked great, but did not manage to produce an orgasm from me. I usually enjoy bullet vibes very much, but I did not come close to orgasm with this one. But again, everyone is different.

The controls on the clit sucker need to be on the opposite side of where they are placed. They are almost impossible to find and click when the toy is attached.

All the different cycles of the clit sucker are fun. It attached to my finger through suction easily. The pulses and throb patterns are a little different than most toys, which is a good thing. Different rhythms are good.

The controls on the bullet vibe are easier to use. However, if it is inserted it would be nice to have a remote included. This would allow some fun couples’ play also. The long stringy rubber end is good to help retrieve the toy if it is inserted.

Overall, I give it 3.5 out of 5 stars. Just because it didn’t get me off doesn’t mean it’s not a good fun toy.

I will upload a video of it’s action to my Twitter, @morgandestera

Saw Him Again!

September 23, 2019

I was lucky enough to get to meet up with my guy again!

I got there in plenty of time. He was still at work. I kicked back, watched some TV (I don’t have cable at home so I don’t watch TV at home) and had a couple of beers. I prepped the bed and got “gussied up”.

He got back and immediately stripped down. Within minutes we were in each others’ arms.

This visit seemed much more relaxed. Probably the most relaxed we have been in-person with each other. It also seemed more intimate, meaning it seemed more than just sex. I always try to hold my feelings in check with him.But this time it seemed we shared more casual conversation. And we showered together for the first time – his room had a great walk-in shower so there was a lot of room. We cleaned each other and I shampooed his hair.

Our kinks actually timed up well this time. I guess you can’t get much more intimate than sharing body fluids lol.

It was just fun and serene. I felt no pressure to perform or to leave. It was relaxing and we crossed a couple of things off our “sexual bucket list” (which is more of a scroll at this point, lol.)

I MAY be able to meet up with him next week too. It may not be an overnighter. I will be visiting my son and he just will happen to be in the next town over…

But his schedule is horrible next week. So I hope it happens 🤞

I may write more later about this in detail.

REVIEW – Adorime G-Spot Rabbit

September 22, 2019

Thank you Adorime for allowing me to test this product.

This was an interesting toy. I am glad the listing online gave some instructions. It would have been nice to have a small insert in the box with some of these printed up, rather than have to go back to the listing. It’s shape was kind of baffling for a solo user. This is a great couples toy.

The biggest selling point is that it has three motors, one located on each tip. The motors are pretty powerful and the battery was still strong after over an hour of continued use.

Rechargeable and water-resistant are also good selling points.

The y-shaped end was very good while pressing one end on my clit, better than the longer dildo end. However, it was hard to hold in this position. My hand started cramping. The controls too, were hard to find and press. This toy could benefit from a separate remote.

It is a very versatile toy. I used the y-shaped end on and around my nipples and got good stimulation there as well.

I give this an overall grade of 4 out of 5.