Transfer Post – He’s Too Good

July 18, 2018

He is too good. He understands my struggle with my self-esteem. Just last night we were talking and he said this – “That’s my gift to you… be proud of your body and be brave enough to try new things. Who cares what other people think.” He goes on later to say “I just don’t want you to be embarassed about your body. Show me all those sexy curves…Just trying to make you understand they turn me on…Here’s my philosophy, i don’t care if you’re tall, short, fat, skinny, big tits, no tits, as long as you’re fun and kinky…”

Transfer Post – Lightening Up

July 14, 2018

Things are lightenng up just a little bit for MM. I talked to him Thursday and last night (Friday) we had some quality time for a change. Two weeks more and things will be even better for a couple of weeks, then he goes home for a week before (maybe, they are having a hard time replacing him when his contract ends, so he may end up workng another week before switching contracts and not going home. I would say good, but the poor guy needs a little down time, even if its not with me). Once his new contract starts, he’ll be moving around more. But the first six weeks or so he’ll be in “our” city (where we first met up, and even before that was my favorite city). That’s when we should be able to meet up again. I’ll probably fly this time so not to wear out our poor car (it should be fixed by then, but still need to save miles). I know we are both looking forward to getting together again.
It loks like next spring might offer us a few chances to meet up too 🙂

Transfer Post – Independence Day

July 4, 2018

Talking to MM today. He has the day off for the holiday and even didn’t go on the company boat outing so he could talk to me and stay out of the heat. Poor guy keeps falling asleep though. I let him go, he needs it. He always apologizes. Another month or so til he ends this contract and maybe can catch up a bit. Amazing how my mood has shifted, though I’m still down.

EDIT: LATER

And my car broke down again. Had to walk a few miles hime in 93 degree heat with a bag of groceries. Seems to be the same thing as a couple months ago. I knew it wasn’t just the battery

Transfer Post – I Was Asked For An Update

July 3, 2018

No update really. Ex is on some new meds that is supposed to help. They seemed to work really well for a few days, but his cough returned over the weekend and he is still having lung pain. But overall he is a little better. He has some color at least.

MM hhas been silent. Long hours plys I suspect he went home for a few days for the holiday, though he didn’t tell me. If he did, this is the first time he didn’t let me know. I am sending him motivation, and he is reading them, but not replying. He did this before when he was home or very busy.

Last week I was really down, just felt like crying every day. I am still down, but a tad better than I was. Still I miss him. We haven’t had the chance to really talk in quite a while it seems.

Oh, right now there are 5 planets in retrograde…

Even More Censorship

July 7, 2019

So, “The Visit” is not searchable under Amazon basic searches. It can be found under Advanced Search though. Yet my other titles are searchable. This is maddening.

“I checked from my end to see that your paperback “The Visit: An Erotic Short Story” (ASIN B07TT7CSD7) is searchable under “Advanced Search” option.

“The reason your book is not showing up in the regular search results is because your book has been classified as an Adult product.

Adult products are suppressed from the regular search query on US, UK, FR, ES and IT marketplaces.”

We shouldn’t have to censor ourselves to remain mainstream. There is no underage/incest or anything in this story. And I even warn the reader in the story. It’s hard enough to market our stories.

Maybe writers need to protest the actions rather than change our writings.

Transfer Post – He’s Back!

June 27, 2018

I heard from my MM. Yay! He has today (Wednesday) off so he messaged me as soon as he got home at 12:45 am. Yay! We chatted for a bit. But because of the problems at his work and things getting delayed because of the accident, I won’t be able to go see him in July. Ugh! It’s always something! But we are planning September in one of my favorire cities – which is where we first hooked up three years ago. So that better damn well work out!

Also due to the accident, his schedule is haywire. There are going to be a LOT more long days for him. So I won’t hear as much from him either. This year has just been riddled with communication disruptions – first him being home from Feb. to April, then this ladt three weeks, and now the unknown. I told him to keep in touch as much as he can. And told him I’d be sending him “motivational” photos and videos.

Damn – why can’t things just smooth out and life be decent for a change!

At least I’ll talk to him more later today

Transfer Post – Another Update

June 24, 2018

I have been down in the dumps lately. My MM has been workng 16-hour days for the past 2 ½ weeks straight through, no days off. Its crunch time for him and not sure when he might get a day off. I did get a brief message from him apolgizing, and told him not to worry about me. I know he’ll be back, but it kills my mood when I don’t hear from him for days and days. Plus an accident (nin-injurous but structural damage) at his workplace may screw up our getting together since it has delayed his schedule by two weeks – what was supposed to start has been delayed. So his schedule is really up in the air at the moment.

I also found out two weeks ago that I was again denied SSI disability.. grrrr…. so now I have to appeal….and wait and wait and wait again to go in front of a judge again

The thing is, I don’t know if I have enough time for that. My ex is not doing well, not bouncing back at all. His cough is fierce and his energy level is still low. Tuesday we go to the lung specialist. Maybe I’ll know more then. My biggest thought is that if he dies, I am homeless…

Transfer Post – The Ex 2

May 20, 2018

A lot has been going on with the ex. He has had 3 out of 4 chemo treatments now. He is still home. He’s doing better, but not fantastic. We went out of state to see the doctors in charge of his case and came back with bad news about his eye. He may never regain full sight in it. The conjunctiva is leaking and covering more than half the eye on the surface. Surgery can be done, but The surgery that they can do is risky, and of course hey absolutely will not do it while he is flaring WG and because he could actually lose the eye because the cornea is very thin under the glob they have to remove. So it could puncture and basically deflate. Not a direct granuloma on the eye, but his WG caused the scarring which led to the cornea “meltng” (doctor’s words) which led to the stuff leaking.

I had to go get an ultrasound on my arm. I woke up last Sunday to find it really swollen and i could barely move it. Haven’t gotten results back, but it is doing much better now. Almost normal. I was so exhausted by Friday that after I got back from taking ex to chemo, i slept for 18 hours straight! And then took another 2 hour nap a couple hours later!

MM has been great through all this. He is pretty much the only one who asks how I am, and not the ex. (Others get around to it eventually, but the first question is always how is ex). We’ve had some killer sexting, which helps relax me. I had a bad show of low self-confidence today and he cheered me through it. I am so glad to have him in my life! Next weekend is Memorial Day here in the states, and he is meeting his wife and kids in New York City for sightseeing – the kids have not been there, which I find amazing since Rig is in NYC quite a bit. So I’ll be bored over the holiday, not hearing from him and with no plans.