TOY TEST – Funzze Inflatable Vibrator

January 29, 2025

This will be a rather short review because I received and tested this toy back in November but I fell down some stairs, injured myself, and was unable to actually write this review until now. Unfortunately now my impressions of this toy are hazy.

This is another fun Funzze product. But there are a few flaws. The first problem I had was with the “handle”. This toy features an embedded shaped handle which I found to be awkward to hold. Also the placement of the power and mode buttons are in a spot which is hard to access when holding the handle. I fumbled around trying to find the right button in a comfortable manner.

My second issue is that this toy just does not inflate large enough. I have played with inflatables before and truthfully they are one of my favorites as usually I can inflate them very large and pull them out while still inflated. This toy does not seem to inflate barely at all, and even worse does not have a setting where you can stop it during its inflate cycle and still keep air in it.

But the toy does have some good points, the first being that is is an automatic inflator. I have used a lot of manual ones and while you can inflate them rather large, you do have to have a little bit of dexterity to be able to close off the valve to keep it inflated while it’s still inside you if you are alone.

Another good point is that this has dual action. It only doesn’t inflate, but it also vibrates at the same time. And you can use the vibration separate if you wish. It does offer a bit of variety also with 5 expansion speeds & 9 vibration patterns.

Overall, I rate this toy about a 3 1/2 out of five. It would rate a lot higher if it just inflated a bit larger and if it could stay inflated for a long period of time.

You can purchase the toy through this link – https://funzze.com/products/inflatable-vibrator

The full unboxing and test video is now live on my Pornhub – https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=6799925b7859e

Art

January 28, 2025

I’ve been getting restless lately. I need to do something creative. My long-form writing has not doing well due to brain fog from my medications. So I decided to start painting,

I know I’m not the best artist by far. But I need the outlet.

This, as well as some of my writings, can be found at https://morgandestera.etsy.com

NOTE: I have revamped my shop and have lowered prices on s lot of items. Larger items you can now make offers on. One out of stock story has been renewed!

#erotic #art #etsy

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Cover image courtesy of Angelica Noi. Photography by Chris Nutt.

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Erotic Fiction

Fern River Cub, Come-In (Part 2)

Jerusalem Mortimer, In the Realm of the Sensei – Prologue 5

Peach Kisser, Mid-Flight Hospitality

Simone Francis, Fetish Secretary

Ambyr Leigh, My Terrible Date Fucked Me Bareback In The Backseat Of His Car

Schey Place Books, The Story So Far

ELust 180

TOY TEST – Twisted Beast Marchosias

December 23, 2024

“In demonology, Marchosias is a great and mighty Marquis of Hell, commanding thirty legions of demons. In the Ars Goetia, the first book of The Lesser Key of Solomon (17th century), he is depicted as a wolf with griffin wings and a serpent’s tail, spewing fire from his mouth. At the request of the magician, he may take the form of a man.” (According to Wikipedia.) This is a very apt name, as this toy is a demonic beast, molded in the depiction of a canine phallus, knot and all.

As you can see, this toy – the “small” version is pictured – is a beast. This toy is 8 1/2 inches tall, 2 inches across the widest part of the knot, and impressively weighs over a pound. The medium and large versions of this measure 10 1/2 inches and 13 inches! But wait! There’s an Extra Large Marchosias out there at a frightening (yet curiously —-) with a 16 inch total length – 14 inches of which is insertable.

I did try to use this vaginally but was soon tamed by this beast. I did not even add my woes to the toy test video. It was too much for me. Instead I called my friend, who again very willingly stepped up to the plate to present his anus to the demon.

I must say I enjoyed handling this toy much more than I did The Serpent. The heft of this item made using it on him much easier. I was able to firmly push it in and hold it there. The knot caught his hole at the widest, holding him there. My friend gave a valiant effort but did tap out.

I was glad to see that the larger versions of this toy are suction cup compatible. That will make it much easier for solo play. The small size, however, is not adapted for one so if you are looking to play alone, you may want to use a medium or even bigger.

Here are my friend/test subject’s view on the toy:

“I found this product to be as advertised. I liked the fact that it was not made of hard plastic so that it could change shape a little bit and make it easier for me to accommodate all of it. This one stretched me out and I can feel it. This is one that didn’t exactly feel comfortable but I think that was the point. I think this is one that if I used more often I would eventually get used to it as it was though I thought it was a nice thrill ride”.

He also gave me a nice compliment: “I know this won’t go in the review but I have a lot of positive things to say about the technique of the person who put it inside me. You do a really good job. You’re not rough at all but you also making clear that this is what you signed up for and it’s going in 😂 ❤️”

This toy is top tier! It’s beautifully made also – the one pictured is in “demon blood” color, but you can also get it in demon blood (ombré). I rate this as a solid 9, just on the reactions of my friend. The cost is more higher end, but it highly recommended. It could give you a goal to work up to.

You can purchase the Marchosias here: https://www.twistedbeaststore.com/products/marchosias-dog-dildo

Video of the unboxing and the test is on my Pornhub: https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=6767867d99bba

How Taboo Are You?

New Toy From My Guy

December 9, 2024

I opened up a box from my guy a few days ago and couldn’t help but laugh. A large bottle of white lube appropriately named “Jizz”. I had to smell it… it had no scent. It also had no real taste either. But it is a very nice water-based lubricant that is as thick and creamy as the real thing.

Then a few days later I got another package and laughed even harder. Not only was it a dick in a box – it was a squirting dick in a box. The Jizz lube was for the toy.

You can view the video here: https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=67571906f3987

TOY TEST – Twisted Beast “The Serpent”

November 30, 2024

Wow… this toy… ::chef’s kiss::

I really am not sure what to say about this toy because there’s just so much to say about it.

Twelve inches of fun silicone — there is an 18” version also — beautifully sculpted and colored in demon’s blood. The full 2” diameter is actually the easy part of the experience. Even the wrapper is cool since it’s shrink wrapped with the Twisted Beast logo and not just haphazardly thrown in a bag or box.

I love the look of this Snake dildo. The snake skin look and feel and the snake head reflects a demonic aura. The sheer length is enough to intimidate even the most experienced users (that’s one reason I went for the 12 inch because the 18” frightened me). It also comes with a collectible holographic art card featuring the toy, a great carrying bag, and a good sized bottle of Twisted Beast’s own lube. The bag itself is rather large and I have it hanging on my wall because I love the logo.

The Serpent does have some heft to it. But the weight combined with the length also makes it a bit hard to control. After trying to stick it to my shower wall several times, I realized there was no suction cup! Therefore, it was very hard for me to use this on myself. (The 18″ size of The Serpent comes with it’s own removable Suction Cup and are Vac U Lock Compatible.) I had to recruit somebody to help me test out this toy.

I lubed up his ass as well as the toy. It was very difficult to get the toy started just because of its floppiness and because of the lube. I had to try several times to get this Snake dildo seated but once I did, it slid in much easier. The trick is not to get discouraged. It was even harder to insert the second time, as my hands and the toy were even more coated with lube. The toy slid through my hands several times before entering the canal.

It seemed to take forever to insert the entire length. My friend jerked when it hit the sphincter and I did have to pause, but he was a trooper and allowed me to continue. Both times he took almost the entire length. He said he enjoyed it immensely and was grateful for its softness. While I would advocate for a sturdier toy simply to make it easier to insert – it’s hard to get going because of the flex in it. I think we both decided that perhaps a firmer head and maybe the 1st inch or so would help get it into the anal cavity. The diameter was never a problem.

I did try it vaginally on myself as well. It was easier for me to do this and I admit I did love the textured skin. However again its length made it awkward to use. Part of the problem though are yhe dimensions of my own inside. This toy was not made for vaginal use.

I have to take that thought into consideration during my rating. It’s a fantastic toy, very well made and I do believe it is worth the money. I rate it 4.3 out of 5 (remember I am trying to be more honest in my number rankings). I wish Twisted Beast included the suction cup or at least made one available in their shop and encouraged people to get one when they purchase this. I also would like to see it a bit stiffer to help in solo play.

You can purchase The Serpent here: https://www.twistedbeaststore.com/products/the-serpent-snake-dildo

The full video of the testing process is on my Pornhub and can be viewed at: https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=674a49a948e87

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Valid: Nov.23th – Dec.2th🏷🏷

Applied to all products. Buy more, save more! Buy on Funzze.com👆👆

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#erotic #art #etsy

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