Quick check-in. I haven’t said much lately because there hasn’t been anything to say. I haven’t talked to My MM in over a week (sigh). But he is extremely busy! He is finishing up one contract while simultaneously starting up another. Next week he’ll be in NYC, then he’ll be 2 weeks home with the family, then another week in NYC before we can even think about seeing each other again. Also, you may remember he had two friends commit suicide earlier this summer – well, they had to put one of their dogs to sleep too! I haven’t been able to talk to him much all summer, but glad he still tells me what’s going on. I am not overthinking as much as i used to, but i still wonder in the back of my head if he’s just trying to let go slowly. Even though i have told him multiple times to just tell me if he wants out. I guess i’ll find out as time goes on.
Funny thing though…i had my tarot cards read. I have used this same woman 3 or 4 times now and each time she really seems to nail it. I have had psychics and tarots before that have never been as accurate as she is. But anyways she said that he is kind of in a bad state of mind, but i have to make up my mind to be the “guiding light he needs to reach his full potential” or go off on my own. And that he will let me in, but it may not for a long time. Maybe not on this timeline at all but that we WILL meet again (afterlife). She also said i can choose to be there for him while still being true to myself. Well if i can be there for him and help him, i am all for that! As one of my friends once said, my life is infinitely better with him in it.
I just have to be happy myself too. And so far I am — i just miss him!
Morgan Destera 